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Making Manners Fun I never thought I'd wax nostalgic over the TV shows of my youth, such as "The Brady Bunch," "Bugs Bunny" and "George of the Jungle." Ah, for a return to those wide-eyed innocent days. While Barney and Fred Rogers valiantly press on with their struggle to instill good manners and solid life lessons, they must compete with the influence of raucous Saturday morning shows. Gratuitous violence abounds -- and, what's worse, so do sassy attitudes. Today's tikes grow up idolizing cartoon characters who tell adults, "Eat my shorts." What great lessons for my three children to learn! I've got good news, however. There's time to teach children good manners, while they're still young enough to think parents are their friends and "the good guys," and they're too young to know how to change the channel or read TV Guide. I found a book that can be a life saver. It's called Do I Have to Say Hello? and was written by Delia Ephron. That probably explains the subtitle, Aunt Delia's Manner Quiz for Kids and Their Grownups. It's cleverly written in quiz form, with the wrong answers so silly and hilarious that my four-and-a-half-year-old says "yes" to them just to hear himself giggle. And though it's not specifically written for that age group, it is not wasted on him. With chapters devoted to every kind of social situation from telephone etiquette, movie manners, birthday parties, school and playground interaction to restaurant manners, giving compliments and holiday manners (they're right around the corner!), this book is indispensable.

Test your manners You're having dinner at Aunt Delia's house. "What about some string beans?" Aunt Delia asks. "They're so delicious." You hate string beans. What do you say? -- "Yuck." -- "Give them to Uncle Jerry. He looks like a string bean." -- "No, thank you." The best thing about Ephron's book is that it's so easy to get your child involved in the fun. My favorite page is the sharing chart. It shows seven interesting drawings depicting different situations and ways children share (or don't). My son Alexander loves it, too. And whenever I tell him to share some cookies or toys with his little sister, he's always sure to say, "Like the silly chart?" and I affirm, "Like the silly chart." Okay, sometimes he says he wants to share like the potato chips (where the little girl is hogging the bag and handing over only one chip) instead of like the watermelon (where they're splitting the fruit 50/50), but it's a start, right? Things don't always work like a textbook in real life. One of my favorite places in my house is the bathroom. After all, it's the only room in the house that I can be assured some privacy at least 50% of the time. Alexander and I have gone over the chapter on "interrupting" many, many times: Uncle Jerry is in the bathroom and you have to ask him a question. What do you do? -- Barge in and surprise him. -- Yell, "Are you ever coming out?" -- Knock and say, "Excuse me, Uncle Jerry, can I talk to you when you are done?" Most of the time, Alexander takes these lessons to heart. I still tremble in my chair when we have company, but so far we've been successful. Overall, this book makes it a lot more likely that he will be considerate of others' feelings -- at least 75% of the time. What parent could ask for more? by Jennifer I.W. Hess Jennifer I.W. Hess is a free-lance writer, amateur computer hacker, and full-time mother of three pre-schoolers. Do I Have to Say Hello? can be found at the following branches of the Free Library of Philadelphia: Frankford, Holmesburg, Northeast Regional, Tacony, West Philadelphia and Wynnefield